The facts. Just the facts. And only the facts. But not all of them.

or, who is this guy?

Last updated: Friday, 09-Sep-2005 16:23:47 EDT

 

ALL names are assigned or assumed unless otherwise noted or I forgot or something.

WHO, part one: Well, basically, I'm a 30+-years-old man of the nonwhite persuasion (hey, that ain't no suntan in that drawing, you know). According to my schedule, I should be having a midlife crisis any minute now. (Of course, since I had one at 24, I'd be repeating myself.) And also a person of the nonheterosexual persuasion. Transplanted from the wild wild West into the land of heat, humidity and lotsa people. Owned by two cats, Thing One and Thing Two. (Well, no, that's not what I call them, but I could hardly confess in public that I call them "Hey, stupid" and "Cat" because all the cat people I know would hurt me real bad.)

Unfortunately, the drawing to the left is all too accurate. (Although not quite round enough.) In fact, if it were actually me, I'd even know which picture it was drawn from. If ever I find out who drew it, we will Have Words.

WHAT: You mean, what do I do for a living? I'm a librarian and/or computer geek (depends on the day)

WHERE: deepinahearta Chicago, working for The Institution. The particular department shall be called The Ministry, and the particular section that I work for is the Bureau of Information Systems. (AKA simply The Bureau, The Department, The Hellhole, etc.)

WHO, part two: ALL names are assigned or assumed unless otherwise noted. That said, people who may wander through these pages include:

• my oldest and dearest friend (who lives in a land even more humid than Chicago--how he survives, I'll never know) who travels through these pages under the name of F in the older entries and Fred in more recent ones,
• Northern Lass: my other best friend who lives up in the northern burbs of Chicago. (Don't ask me why or how I picked that name for her; it's just how I think of her sometimes; hey, if I could explain me to me, would I be doing this?),
• Northern Lass' husband, who shall henceforth be known as Peculiar Man (no initial), because after you've known him for any length of time, you WILL hear someone say, "My, isn't that ... peculiar," about something he's done,
• The child of Northern Lass and Peculiar Man, known as Little P, because his name starts with the same letter as his father's,
• various and diverses relatives (My mother will be known as Mom--hey, nobody said I was original),
• various and diverses peoples at work: my boss will be The Boss, her boss will be the Director, my current coworker is The CoWorker and we'll wing the rest, shall we? Let's shall,
• The Good Ex-Roomie, alternatively known as W or Walter;
• The Evil Ex-Roomie (well, who needs another name with a sobriquet like that?)
• and many many others. I hope.

WHAT, part two: Also, I happen to write rather a lot of rather smutty fiction (adults only, thanks). Once upone a very long time ago, I ran a fan fiction archive. (No, I don't intend to explain fan fiction at the current moment, thanks; you'll just have to catch up.) None of the smutty fiction is currently available online, as I'm trying to get someone to pay me to do it.

Yes, I do write nonsmutty fiction, with my own characters and plots and everything, but I don't generally post it on the net. Someday, maybe I'll actually send it to a publisher and make money from it.

Hey, I can dream, cant I?

Onward to Ruminations of a Western Expatriate