Media Relations: media commentary and criticism

Monday, October 14, 2002

death stars

Chicago Tribune | Now you see 'em, now you don't: ...This television season seems particularly flush with that category of actor we'll call the Death Star. It is time for these people to either get a new agent, learn how to read a script for quality, or make some kind of offering to the fates to change their luck. One other option: Grow moles and become character actors.

Heh. "Death Star".

Really, nothing substantive to say about this one. I just like the concept of actors that you cast and virtually guarantee the death of a show. (Also, the false drops that this entry is going to generate once it gets into search engines will be truly spectacular. But I digress. And snicker.)

Imagine, if you will, all of these actors in one big garbanzo ensemble show. A comedy, I suppose it would have to be. I can't imagine some of these people in comedies, but I can't imagine Bonnie Hunt in anything serious, and she's as big a name as you get in this lot.

Any road, the supernova potential of this show would be ... amazing, really. I can just imagine the executives of a network talking to the press after the initial airing. All those gray suits (yes, even the women will be wearing smart gray dress suits), everyone pale and stunned and helpless. The crowd of shareholders before them surly and upset. The executives would try to excuse their blunder. "We ... we didn't know. We just didn't know. Who would have thought you could wrie a show that bad? Who would have thought that one show could destroy an entire network? We just didn't know!"

Is there a network out there needs killin'? There's a show I'd like to pitch.....

Posted by iain at 10:24 PM in category